Mi vida loca

Hmm, let's see.. If you are following me chances are you already know quite a bit about me.. I'm the oldest of four beautiful women (the youngest is 13 going on 30) and my mom was a single parent. we were brought up to be humble and not take for granted the gifts we were given because there wasn't much..we had the basics and that was enough for us..The men that were around aren't worth more than this mention so she did the best she could and raised some amazing children if I do say so myself (on a good day..lol)..

I have been through more than the average woman my age but me amo mi vida loca (i love my crazy life). There are days when I wonder what god really has in store for me to conquer since everyday is something different..I've been physically, emotionally, sexually and mentally abused but I refuse to be a statistic or let any of that hold me back from loving life and all of the wonders and knowledge it has brought me.. I am thirsty for learning and never take an opportunity to do so for granted and prove to myself that I can be better then I was because I have been at the bottom and I DO NOT want to go back there..

I make sure that I put myself first because if I am not happy with me then I will never be happy with anyone else. I have done the medication and therapy route and they worked for awhile when i was really having problems dealing with everything but I only go to therapy when I really need it. I am a firm believer in asking for help. Somethings you really cannot do on your own and if you have a support system then use it because they are your anchor.

There were days when I felt like I had nothing left for anyone to take and nothing left to give and it wasn't worth staying around but I am here because of those around me..I am, in the words of an inspirational person, A beautiful mess inside and I can't wait to find that someone who is more than happy to jump in and take the time to discover all of the amazing things about me that are hidden..

I have the most amazing group of friends around me..I have had to weed out quite a few but I can honestly say the ones who have stuck around are the real ones. They have seen the good, the bad and the downright ugly and still see the beauty inside me. Never, ever, let anyone take away your ability to love and trust because without trust you will be miserable and full of hate and unable to achieve your dreams. Forgive those who do you wrong, why? because in the end whatever wrong they have done will come and destroy them in the end. Be honest, tell the truth regardless of how bad you think it may hurt someone..telling the truth is preferable to believing the lies..No one is perfect, it is your imperfections that make you who you are and everyone is unique. It sounds hard, and believe me, it is but it is worth the work because being smart about the situations you are in and positive without being colored by your feelings will allow the happiness to come on its own..

with that, I finish my official 2nd post :)

~bells